Here are some more winners from ASL's "This Life Thing" contest!

The most embarassing thing happened when I was sixteen, before I wisened up and went for dick. there was this french exchange student - we will call her veronique - and i was madly in love with her. Her awkwardness was enchanting and sexy as hell. I was nervous, and had no will to hit on her. This was in California, where one can buy booze in the supermarket and, most importantly, one can shoplift huge jugs of
rum in one's raver pants. Again, I was sixteen. There was a party and I drank tumblers of hard alcohol and suddenly veronique was before me, an angel. i had no idea she would be at that party! in my excitement I talked with her, then grabbed her in a warm hug. the hug was important: i projectile-vomited over her shoulder, onto the people behind her. She ran away, screaming.

My most embarrassing moment happened about 6 years ago. My then boyfriend (now husband) were practicing safe sex, and when we were done he threw the condom in the trash can. At the time I had a crazy dog, she went dumpster diving after it while we were out of the room. We had no clue she had done this.
So the next day we were going out of town, and my mom came and took the dog with her to my grandmothers house. Well, my dog ended up pooping under the guest bed, and apparently pooped out the used condom.
My mom called me and in a very seriouse tone said, "I am glad to know that you guys are being safe, but please watch how you dispose of your condoms." Oh, and of course my grandmother was the one who found it!!

During my heady college days, I lived with some rather fun and unusual people. Their house was the go-to party house--primarily because most of us lived there (it was a 6 bedroom house, some of the rooms double occupied). In an effort to create some boundaries (ie. get people to leave), N., the patriarch of the house deemed 2:32 AM "naked time." It was arbitrarily asserted but convention was that if you were in common areas of the house at 2:32, you had to get naked, at least somewhat. So, one night, it was a party. Things were winding down and whoops--it was 2:32. People were still over, but it was mostly the people of the house with a few close friends, so most of us got naked in some way (I chose topless because I knew exactly what went down on our couch). I'm not bashful for the most part, I can be naked in front of strangers or people I know very well, so this was totally fine. Until a group of oh, 4 guys storm in. Which would be cool if they were strangers, but one of the guys was someone whom I supervised at work. Who was older than I. No eye contact was made, but I really wanted my bra. And it's naked time, so I can't just put clothes back on. I have to carry out party conversation with these people for like, an hour.
Sigh. At least it's not my crotch on People's cover.